la nostra storia

being a light

2010-07-05T12:49:00.000-07:00

"For with you is the fountain of life, in your light we see light." Psalm 36:9

"You are the light of the world." Matthew 5:14

I lit a candle tonight but I couldn't see the light hardly at all. The wick had huge walls of wax surrounding it and that little light wasn't able to shine bright. I thought to myself how our lives can become surrounded by walls and how sometimes we have to get through those walls and break them down for our light to be seen once again.

So, I took a kitchen knife and carefully cut around the candle leaving the wick as free and happy as a little wick could be. I lit it and am staring at a beautiful light and wishing that breaking down the "walls" could be as easy as it was for me with my little candle tonight.

long overdue

2010-07-02T06:41:00.001-07:00

I can't start this post without first making myself some Napoletano espresso...be right back.

Okay, that's better. I not only feel like I have been absent from the blogging world but also the world in general. I just finished my first year of teaching English at a little private school called St. Peter's and boy, was it stretching. I absolutely LOVED the location of my school, which sat right across the street from the sea and my favorite little coffee shop but the teaching itself was a lot different from any other school I have taught at. For discipline, I had to rely on hand signals (good hand signals) and small phrases in Italian at the beginning. :) It definitely was worth all the, "I don't understand," and "Could you repeat that please?" At the end of the school year, hearing all my beautiful students speak English, whether it be basic or almost fluent, my heart took joy in their joy.

My mom came to visit me in my little Italian world for Easter and it was a trip we will carry with us forever. We had a magical time, exploring Napoli, then Roma for 2 weeks and I am just so proud that she took that step to get on the plane. I know it can be very scary to travel internationally but she did it, and did it with grace. After being blessed with my mom's presence, my beautiful cousin came over as well. We spent 2 weeks laughing, crying, eating, walking, visiting, taking pictures, making memories and picking up where we left off 7 years ago. It was so refreshing for me to spend time with pieces of my heart and to show them my life.

Now, I'm sitting in my little studio, listening to the sounds of scooters and Italians talking (screaming) back and forth to each other and wondering how in the world I ended up in this place. I have been here for 2 years, on my own for over a year and I'm still not married nor have any concrete plans for it in the future. Antonello is working hard to finish school and his thesis so he can graduate in October and then find a job to start earning some money. Does everything revolve around having enough money?

I sat and read my blog from the very beginning and could see God's fingerprints all over this story of Antonello and I. It brought me back to the place where I was so stinkin' excited for this unknown adventure! As I write this entry after being here for 2 years, with Antonello for almost 3, those fingerprints are harder to see but I think that may be because I am blind. :) I don't think I would ever recommend someone to pick up all their belongings and move away from everything they have ever known, all their friends and family and all that they hold safe to start a life somewhere new and unfamiliar. It has been difficult and it is difficult and I am just trying to see and find those fingerprints again.

When I do see them though, it's like they have been there all along. They are bright and true and in my face and all I can say is, thank you God. Thank you for bringing me here, stretching me, refining me and not letting me stay the same.

I finished my espresso and always feel better to be able to share my heart, even if it is in a blog.

30 days and Antonello and I will be in Seattle, hoping to see more fingerprints.

don't waste it...

2010-03-18T14:59:00.000-07:00

I was listening online to a Twin Lakes Church service the other day and Rene, the pastor, was speaking about problems and what we can gain from them. He spoke about problems having value and producing an element of growth within our lives.

As much as I understand and can see that growth every time I go through problems, it's still no fun and I can't wait for them to be over. But then he said something that struck my heart when he started talking about having wisdom through the trials. He quoted something a woman had said (who was going through a very difficult time) to her pastor after having being asked, "How can I pray for you?" She replied, "Pray that I'll have the wisdom not to waste all this."

Pray I'll have the wisdom not to waste all this. Not, pray this will be over soon. Not just to throw my hands in the air and say, forget it, I'm done and wait for life to be comfortable again. Be present in the moment, in the day, in the hour and commit to finding something good.

Sarah, don't waste these trials and beautiful lessons you've been learning. There is so much light to be seen yet. Have the wisdom and courage to recognize it.

two loves

2010-01-28T14:53:00.000-08:00

This is my little cousin Sam. I adore him. That is "Blue", his toy dog sitting on top of his head with his hands in his pockets. I am thankful beyond words to have him in my life. I just wanted to share a little glimpse of this gift from God.

My other love and the one who inspires me daily is this beautiful woman. My mom. We took this picture at Christmas in front of our tree and I just can't wait to see her in two months when she flies across the ocean to visit me for Easter. I miss her...

am I satisfied...

2010-01-01T19:28:00.000-08:00

Once again, time seems to have slipped through my little fingers and the first thing to go is...the blog. :( So, here is a little tid-bit of how I spent my time during my time back in Seattle for Christmas break.

My beautiful cousin, Jillian, came up to Seattle from Olympia to stay with my mom and I for the weekend after Christmas and we had a blast, reconnecting, shopping, eating, cooking dinner, singing, and just laughing about all our wonderful memories growing up. It was a hard Christmas for her and her brothers, seeing that her mom, my aunt, just passed away months before. I am so grateful for the time I spent with her and she is now in the planning stages of buying a ticket to come visit me this summer! Wohoo!

Jillian and I at UW Village

Eating delicious hot dogs

I was also so so so grateful to have spent much-needed time with my besty, Kristin, who is due this April!!!!!!!! I cannot believe it and I am just beside myself with joy. I laid my head on her beautiful belly one night and as that little girl moved around, I, of course, cried tears of joy. I am so extremely sad I will miss the birth of this little treasure but am looking forward to the day where I can hold my little niece.

Kris and I in our high school pose :)

see how perfect her belly fits into mine!

For the day of Christmas, my mom and I headed down to Olympia to spent time my cousins and had a Christmas like we haven't shared in a long time; together with actual family. It was difficult to know that Aunt Jonnie wouldn't be there with us but to know that our family is somewhat coming together after such a long time of strife, will hopefully put a smile on her heavenly face.

As for Antonello, he stayed in Napoli with his family this year and although it was a little hard to be apart, it was glorious to see his face at the airport when he picked me up in Rome. Oh, what a handsome man I have. :o)

Right now, I am just working working working and trying to find more peace in this country. The language still eludes me at times but I am trying to learn. I titled my blog, 'am I satisfied...' because there are many times during the day, living in this city, where I think, am I truly satisfied here?

Am I satisfied with the constant traffic?
Am I satisfied with having to take the bus every day to work, which is absolutely packed 70% of the time?
Am I satisfied with how difficult it is not to be able to speak the language fluently, even with my own in-laws?
Am I satisfied with my little water heater that takes 1 hour to heat up so I can take a shower and wash the dishes in warm water?
Am I satisfied with the MILLION people who smoke here all the time?
Am I satisfied with not having my neighborhood and familiar roads surrounding me daily?
Am I satisfied with living so far away from my mom...again?
Am I satisfied with not having my good, solid girlfriends around me?
Am I satisfied with not being married yet and desperately wanting to start that part of my life?

Then, the kicker. I think back and read through my journals of how I ended up here in the first place. God brought me to California, to Twin Lakes Church, to go on a missions trip, to be placed with Antonello's family for lunch that Sunday, to take an Italian class at Cabrillo College where my professor adored Napoli and knew of a great Italian school I could go to, to go to that same exact Italian school, to find an apartment right across the street from where his mom works, to have someone at Antonello's church, recommend me for a job teaching English, to being hired to work for St. Peter's where I am currently working....

...am I satisfied? I feel as though my spirit longs for my "comfortable" life I had back in the States but I have to stop myself and think. I would have missed out on seeing and living this beautiful plan that is now part of me.

I am reading back through one of my favorite books, "Ruthless Trust", by Brennan Manning, and I will leave my post with this:

"The reality of naked trust is the life of a pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise."

Am I satisfied? Tonight, I'm overflowing...

my gift

my berfday

2009-12-17T13:27:00.000-08:00

Antonello threw me a surprise birthday dinner for my 30th and I felt so blessed to share it with his family and a few friends. Some of our friends couldn't make it because of the flu that has been wandering around but it was wonderful none-the-less.

I worked a very long day on the 14th, from 11:30-7:00 pm that night, so I was pretty exhausted by the time Antonello picked me up from work. He drove me back home so I could rest a while and then get ready for our "date" together. I had no idea that he was planning this dinner so when I walked into the restaurant and saw little 'nonna' (grammy) standing there trying to hide, I knew something special was up.

It was a wonderful night full of amazing appetizers, wonderful pasta and bread, and champagne with strawberry/whip-cream cake to top it off.

sitting at the table together waiting for some food!!! I thought I had opened all my presents but his parents were saving this one for me as a surprise

I just couldn't believe my eyes....as I screamed "MAMMA MIA"

my own little oven....aahhhh....

(my place is pretty tiny, so this little oven is a piece of heaven for me and my kitchen)

my dude

one of the many beautiful walls that covered the entire restaurant

my birthday cake with fireworks on it :o)

the manly men

the beauties

All in all, it was a wonderful birthday and I loved every minute.

Now, I am trying to clean my house and pack my things before I head off to Seattle once again to spend some time with mom, friends and family for Christmas. Antonello has to stay in Napoli so I am venturing off, yet again, to fly cross-country. Whew...it takes a lot of mental and physical power to keep traveling back and forth.

The other night, Antonello surprised me (again) by calling me after I had an English private lesson at my house and told me to look down from my balcony. Well, that little sneaker was standing on my street smiling at me, telling me to get down there so we could walk to our favorite neighborhood pizzeria to pick up a couple pizzas. On the way back, it started to pour down rain and we were caught in it. It was way fun pretending like we were in a race to get the pizzas home and were literally racing through my narrow streets getting drenched. Fun times.

a new song

2009-12-11T11:30:00.001-08:00

It has been awhile since my last post and so much has happened in the last 3 months. I found a wonderful job at a private school teaching English and even have a couple private lessons at my house during the week. It has provided a level of stability that I so desperately needed. I am finding my way around the city, and although the bus is still difficult to take, I am experiencing Napoli in such a different, beautiful light.

I am so so so looking forward to traveling back to the States for Christmas and having some time off of work, of a different country, of a different language, etc., but I will miss my love. :o)

There was a point, a wall, that I hit sometime in these last three months where I didn't think I could fall deeper in my culture shock, what am I doing, this isn't for me, I miss my comfortable life I used to have, HOLE. I fell into a hole that surrounded me and wouldn't let me go. I was feeling pretty horrible, to say the least, with all my different emotions/feelings/actions/words/thoughts and I prayed every day for some kind of release, for some kind of answer.

Isn't it usually true, that the way we come to a place of light is by going through all the darkness and climbing our way through those holes? Well, I've been doing alot of climbing and am coming to a place in my life where I can finally see how beautiful it is. Not because I'm living in Italy. Not because I'm engaged. Not because I'm living some sort of romantic movie because I'm not. I'm seeing how beautiful God is through all of this and that is a song worth singing.

I am grateful to live life among these Italians, with Antonello, with his family and now with my new work family. WOO-HOO for a new song!

time off

2009-09-22T12:13:00.001-07:00

...taking some time off of blogging for awhile...

rest in peace

2009-09-07T00:15:00.000-07:00

My aunt died at 7:17 on Sunday night. Her four children, my mother, and her 2 best friends of 45 years were by her side as she breathed her last. I am so thankful that she was surrounded by people who loved her so very much.

I was so blessed to be able to go home for a couple weeks to see her. We laughed together as we remembered when she bet me $5 at dinner one night to order like Jim Carrey and at Christmas one year, she asked me to count all the Christmas lights I saw on the houses as I went light-looking with my cousins one evening. I think I was about 6 or 7 at the time and when I came back to her house that night, I told her I counted about 1,000. It sounded like a HUGE number to me and I was so proud I counted all of them for her.

The funeral will be in a couple of weeks and as hard as it is for me to be so far away from my mom and the rest of my cousins, I am at peace because my aunt's body is finally at peace. It has been a rough road for her in life and I am thankful she is seated gently in God's mighty hand.

Thank you for all of your prayers.

death

2009-08-09T14:59:00.000-07:00

My aunt is dying of cancer.

It feels so strange to type those words. Everytime I think about it, my mind sees her laying in bed, with her weak body and bald head surrounded by her four children that are watching their mother die. Before future weddings. Before more grandchildren. My heart breaks to think of it, to picture her, to picture my cousins, to picture my already broken family, and to picture my own mom...and can't imagine having to go through the same thing with her.

So many feelings are racing through my already crowded heart. I fly home this Friday for two weeks to be with my mom and to spend time with my aunt. I don't know if there will be a funeral that I am going to have to attend while I am home; I am just praying/begging/hoping for some kind of unity/peace/reconciliation within my family during this time, through our grief and sorrow.

She is scared to die...and is just waiting for it to happen. What a lonely place to be in. I'm sitting here at my computer, crying, writing this blog in Italy, and feeling how extremely far away, physically, I am from her. I can only cry out and ask God to cover her, my cousins, and her brother and sisters with His tender touch and comfort.

Would you join me?

climbing mountains

2009-08-03T08:48:00.000-07:00

Antonello, his best friend, Fabio and I, all went for a beautiful hike up Mount Vesuvius this past Saturday. It was absolutely spectacular...on so many levels. Here are some of the amazing sculptures we saw on our drive up to the hiking point.

Here is Antonello on the way up the mountain. The whole time I just kept thinking, this is an active volcano, not that I think it would erupt or anything, but just the fact of how much force and power it had and has. From my studies on Pompeii, which was the city that was buried under the 79 AD eruption of Mount Vesuvius, this area of Napoli is the most dangerous and most highly monitored area because of how active this mountain has been and how incredibly dense the population is here. It was awesome to look out on the Bay of Napoli and see where I live, right on the waterfront. :0)

The hike was pretty steep all the way to the top. And when I say 'top', I mean the outer rim of the volcano because after the eruption of 79 AD and another in 1948...the 'top' is a hole now.

Here I am standing in front of the "mouth" of the volcano...it was really special for me because only a couple months before, I was studying about Pompeii and about Mount Vesuvius and all the characteristics of the eruption and then to see the actual evidence left over...remarkable.

the "mouth"

aerial view of Mount Vesuvius - the outer rim is where we were able to walk around!

It was an incredible day. After we hiked up, I spent a little time just looking out over the bay and foggy mountain tops and felt quiet. Not only was it quiet up on the mountain, but also quiet in my soul. I love being outside and part of God's beautiful world.

My project now, besides studying for my online TEFL certification to teach english, is printing on these old tiles for some of the faithful servants who work at the Old Mill Camp (Vecchio Mulino) where Antonello volunteered this summer for an English camp. I love being able to use my artsy side! :0)

A+ day

2009-07-27T07:25:00.000-07:00

Antonello, his family, and I all went to a beautiful beach last Friday, just south of Rome and had a wonderful day playing in the water, kicking around the soccer ball, eating delicious food and.....getting burned. Oh, that part. That definitely wasn't wonderful or is it wonderful to look at my cooked body even today...on Monday.

I know, I know. Didn't you wear sunscreen Sarah? You have such white, delicate skin!! And the answer is YES, I put on so so so much sunscreen but I'm telling you, the sun that day was cookin' everyone. Antonello's shoulders took a beating, and even his aunt and uncle who came along got burnt as well.

On Saturday, I spent all day in bed with a 101 degree temperature feeling like fried chicken...horrible. The good news is that even though I can still see/feel the effects of that hot Friday, I am feeling so much better. I even slept for 6 hours straight last night without having to get up, get some ice, go to the bathroom, drink some water, & pray over my aloe vera bottle.

Today has been quite joyful to say the least. I did both loads of laundry I needed to get done, hung all my clothes out to dry, went to the grocery store and bought some yummy fruit, eggs and stuff to make home-made pasta sauce, made a delicious lunch with penne pasta and marinara with fresh basil and parm cheese, studied for my online TEFL (Teach English as a Foreign Language) certificate, am now updating my blog and later, after my afternoon caffe', study this beautiful language I am surrounded by daily.

Grade for the day: A+

no words

2009-07-17T08:03:00.000-07:00

Antonello and I the night before camp ended :(

Antonello and the "American" boys!

Antonello and I with our new friends, Sarah and David

Sarah, Leanne and I

my beautiful Italian loves

I just got back from a week of being a leader for an Italian/American camp with 12 Americans from California and over 50 campers from 3 different churches here in Naples.

Crazy? Yes. Loud? Very. Fun? Of course. Memories to Last a Lifetime? Many.

Are there words? Are there words to describe when God literally picks you up and shakes the chains loose? I was actually dreading this camp; I was dreading trying to survive and spend any more time in Italy with my broken Italian...and on top of still not being able to fully communicate, I was just hoping that Antonello and I would make it out....together.

I am literally staring at my computer screen, shaking my head and feeling so THANKFUL. I wish I could put into words what happened at the Old Mill Camp; I feel so much of it is just something that lives within me now and is a part of how I operate and see the world.

I not only survived, but lived the experience. 12 Americans flew over from Los Altos, California and were critical in leading the program part of camp. From the moment I found out I would be able to spend a week with fellow english speakers, my heart did a little leap...what I didn't expect was the kind of relationships that would be formed during that time as well. It was an absolute joy and answer to prayer to spend day after day with such talented and gifted leaders. We prayed together, ate the most delicious food (every day :)), watched kids make beautiful choices for their lives, played in the hot Italian sun and did it all for God. Nothing is more powerful than that.

A definite blessing my new American friends were to me during camp, but the way I connected with my new culture as well left me floored. My Italian grew in leaps and bounds and the love and appreciation I have for this country and for these beautiful campers/students/friends is overflowing. Antonello and I were able to spend time with about 20 of them last night for a little reunion, and you could feel the growth between us all; what a gift.

As for Antonello and I...well...I have never felt such respect, appreciation, admiration and love for another man. I saw him become this amazing leader, not only with the campers but with the staff as well. I have always been a little worried in the back of my mind if Antonello would fit in America, if we move over there. The answer I got was loud and clear; ABSOLUTELY. It was such a joy to watch him laugh and grow and be able to share this experience together.

At one point during the week, one of the American leaders, Sarah, ran outside to find me because she had to show me something. Antonello and Sarah were on the same team together and their group was in charge of cleaning the kitchen that night. Sarah grabbed my hand and led me to the kitchen where I poked my head in and saw Antonello's whole team dancing to the radio while doing the dishes. Antonello had his back to me and was in his own world, shaking his little booty while drying the silverware. Of course, I joined in the dancing and will always have that beautiful smile on Antonello's face in my mind.

As Antonello and I got home last Saturday, we had 3 bags of laundry (which took 2 days to do!) and tears in our eyes. It was incredible.

Not only do I get to live with camp in my heart, I had an interview with an English language school yesterday and am now a registered teacher there. I will be able to give individual lessons as well as travel to different schools throughout Naples to prepare students for exams or even to provide english teaching to people in the business world. There is no set schedule as of yet and there are other teachers that have first priority, seeing that they have worked there longer, but I am not going to let that discourage me. I trust in God and I know opportunities will open for me just the same. For the rest of the summer, I enrolled in an online course to be certified to teach English as a second language so that will keep me busy until September rolls around to begin! :)

a sneak peek

2009-07-15T11:06:00.000-07:00

"Old Mill Camp 2009"

It has been WAY TOO LONG since my last post so here is a picture of what I have been up to this past week and a half and I promise an actual post will be coming soon!

edible art

2009-06-28T08:27:00.000-07:00

I am continually amazed by Franco, Antonello's dad, when he uses his exceptional artist skills and creates these delicious pieces of edible art. I better watch next time! :)

buckets and food :o)

2009-06-22T03:20:00.000-07:00

The first video was from yesterday as I was hanging my clothes out to dry. All of a sudden, a rope with a bucket tied on it flew down from nowhere (well, from a couple stories up) and landed on the street below to catch some much needed items. I caught the bucket just as it was heading home. :) What fun to live in Italy....

The second is a video that speaks for itself. I gotta get started if I want to cook like grammy!!!!

living

2009-06-20T03:13:00.000-07:00

The best beginning to each of my days in Italy is to make myself a hot little cup of espresso. It was my first Sunday alone at my house today because I am usually with Antonello and his family for a busy day of church, a HUGE lunch and a soccer game. But on this day, on this glorious day, I was here by myself and loved each moment of the quiet streets and cool wind running across my balcony.

After waking up to no power and then having it restored at 9 a.m., I was able to get in 2 loads of laundry...there is nothing like clothes hung out to dry by the golden sun. If you take a close look, Antonello and I put up a yellow mosquito net to keep those little rascals out at night. I currently have 11 bites on my feet alone. Grrr....

After journaling and a little "soul searching" (much needed with being so far away from home, not working, and stress upon stress), I looked out towards the sea and found the most beautiful clouds that ended one of my most peaceful days I have had since I have been here. It was a pure gift from God.
This little photo, which wasn't exactly from today, is a photo taken from the most beautiful park overlooking Napoli. I included this pic because I am ending my day dreaming tonight...of being with a certain someone on a certain day wearing certain clothes with all of it happening at this certain park. We'll see...buona notte. (good-night)

Positano

2009-06-09T13:04:00.000-07:00

Antonello, 4 visiting Americans, 3 Italian brothers and myself all took a trip down the Amalfi coast to visit one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen, Positano. Don't get me started on how dumb I am because I forgot my camera but we ended taking some pics on Antonello's phone which we haven't uploaded yet. We ended up catching the last bit of sun while walking through the narrow streets filled with little shops and restaurants; it was quite magical. By the time we reached the center of the little city which is located right on the sea, it was already dark outside so the picture above gives a very clear picture of what I saw that night.

I have to go back during the day...WITH my camera! :) Now, to figure out a way to start earning some money because I have walked past too many beautiful, Italian clothes that I can't quite get my hands on. Oh, and rent. :)

the gold chair

2009-05-28T14:01:00.000-07:00

WAIT.

Why is this one little word so hard for me to swallow?

WAIT.

It is difficult to wait. It is difficult to not know what lies ahead in the next year, month, week, day, hour. God calls us to wait, especially when it involves His best for our lives.

I find myself waiting and it feels unfair, to be honest.

My mom loves to tell this story of when I was a little girl. Cheri (mom) and 4 year-old Sarah were in the grocery store together and happened to walk past the candy aisle...oh no. I guess little curly-haired Sarah Louise stopped and took a good look at all the precious bags of sugar and chose one she wanted, without permission. A yummy lookin' bag of M&M's. Cheri put her foot down, knowing her little girl didn't need a bag of candy and said....."NO". Well, that didn't sit right with sweet Sarah who wanted that candy and didn't want to WAIT. She wanted it NOW. Sarah didn't back down and ended up throwing the bag of M&M's on the floor and as the little pieces of goodness splattered all over the aisle, Cheri took Sarah out of the store as she began to throw a temper tantrum. They went home immediately and Sarah was placed in the dreaded gold "time-out" chair (which is currently a piece of furniture in the Yonich household).

WAITING. I didn't even want to do it as a little one. Who does? When we want something to happen, how much better would it feel if we could just have that hunger satisfied in the moment. Skip the waiting period.

There is wisdom and growth in learning how to wait. To wait for God. To wait for His best. It's not a matter of God being unfair to make us wait, it's a matter of Him loving us so much that waiting would be the best thing for us to do, however uncomfortable and aggravating it may seem.

I think God is telling me to go sit in the gold chair.

a little goes a long way

2009-05-19T08:07:00.000-07:00

I am thankful for...

* the smell of the sea at night when I stand out on my balcony
* being able to (sometimes) understand at least 70% of an italian sentence
* seeing a friend that I met last year who works at a nearby shoe store
* being part of an italian family so if I am out of food, I can go shopping at their house
* it's not horribly humid outside...yet
* making american chocolate-chip cookies for Antonello's family, yummy!
* figured out how to watch the season finale of Grey's Anatomy on my laptop
* ear plugs (it has been so stinkin' loud at night lately)
* a mother who can change my black day into sunshine

Isn't it amazing what a little thankfulness can do to our spirit? I already feel a little lighter...

a thought

2009-05-16T10:01:00.000-07:00

wouldn't it be wonderful if we could snap our fingers and be the person we dream to be?

a new day

2009-05-05T08:48:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning and needed to strike out on my own. I have done little walks here and there but today I felt like spending some much needed time by myself, exploring my new city, getting lost, finding my way again, and becoming more familiar/comfortable with my life here. It was a new day and I loved every minute of it. My adventures led me, first, to Piazza Gesu', where I found two Americans and walked with them to the waterfront where we explored Castello dell'Ovo and after parting ways, I found my favorite 3-story bookstore where I ordered something to eat and of course, caffe'. I walked back to my little studio along the sea, feeling the warm air all around me and tried to take everything in. The smell of the sea, the noise of the cars and scooters passing me by, the sound of the boats, and the beautiful language I am so desperately trying to learn.

I have a little tutoring job tomorrow night. A 15-year old girl in high school needs help with pronouncing some english words. I think I can do that. :)

Ciao amici!

gelato

2009-04-30T11:44:00.000-07:00

This picture was taken the day after Easter, while Antonello and I were at his uncle's house in Bari, on the east coast of Italy. His aunt took us to this little cafe where we ordered some gelato and while I was going through my pictures tonight, I found this little treasure and now I'm craving some ice cream. I think I have some in my freezer. Gotta go! :)

a little history

2009-04-24T12:18:00.000-07:00

It was "culture week" at the National Archeological Museum in Napoli this week so Antonello and I took advantage of the FREE entry tickets and spent 3 beautiful hours in a world of massive statues, intricate & beautiful mosaics and frescoes that people who once lived in Pompeii, thousands of years ago, displayed in their homes.

IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE to walk around and see the original artifacts, statues, and paintings that existed from 2nd century B.C. to about the 1st century A.D.. All of the research I have been doing on Pompeii only made it that much more exciting to see it in person today and to experience history first-hand.

My computer isn't allowing me to actually see the pictures so I will try and explain what they are in numerical order:
1. an ancient tomb with the different mythical "Gods" carved into the side
2. a huge mosaic representing the battle between Alexander the Great and Darius, the Persian King
3. a HUGE head of Emperor Caesar
4. a common ground mosaic telling people to "Beware of Dog"
5. a breath-taking statue of Flora from the Farnese collection

a bit foggy

2009-04-21T04:43:00.000-07:00

It's 1:44 in the afternoon and I'm sitting at my little orange table looking out to my balcony where the rain won't stop pouring down on the little Italian street below, and I feel lost. It has almost been a year since I have worked last and it's, once again, making me feel purposeless. Not that I'm not looking or anything, but you have to agree, it's becomes a little harder with a different language than your own.

I have no idea what the next step is. I haven't heard back from Bruno, the guy I was praying/wishing/hoping to work with as a guide in Pompeii and all other avenues seem foggy. This language still eludes me and as hard as I try, I still feel and KNOW that I truly can't communicate my heart/ideas/desires fully. Why am I here? What is my purpose? Was I supposed to come back? Am I not listening closely enough for God's little voice in all of this?

As it is still pouring down rain outside, I am now going to turn my attention to my heavy Italian book sitting in front of me and read about my new mountain to tackle: Si impersonale

1. When the si construction is used with an infinitive, the conjugated verb is in the third-person singular or plural, depending on the object of the infinitive.
2. The phrase ci si must be used when a reflexive verb is used impersonally.
3. Compound tenses of impersonal si constructions are formed using 'essere'. If the verb is normally conjugated with 'essere', the past participle is always plural, even if the verb is singular.
4. If the verb is normally conjugated with 'avere' and the sentence has a direct object, the past participle agrees with the direct object in gender and number.

Good luck to me?

first days

2009-04-17T10:25:00.000-07:00

I spent my first day, yesterday, all by myself in my little studio and had a wonderful day unpacking a few things, getting an unexpected visit from my "property manager" named Mustafa (sort of like Mufasa from the Lion King!) who I tried my best to understand and be understood in italian, a long walk to my favorite bookstore by my language school where I ended up buying "Twilight", a wonderful lunch of pasta fagioli (beans) and of course, bread & fruit, and a night of studying some italian and finishing the night with watching an italian show called, "Affari Tuoi" which is like the American show, "Deal or no Deal".

Antonello and I just got back from a walk to the waterfront where we grabbed some gelato and caffe'...I'm still trying to figure out where and how I fit in this country/city that can oftentimes be scary but so liberating at the same time. Now, I'm just praying for a stable job...rent is coming up soon. :)

sigh

2009-04-14T08:04:00.000-07:00

I have unreliable internet access at my little apartment so my posts will be few and far between.

my week

2009-04-09T07:20:00.000-07:00

Here are some pics of my little apartment right in the heart of Napoli. We are still trying to figure some things out so tomorrow will be my first night by myself. When I stop and think about it, I feel like it's someone else's life. This time around, being my second time experiencing life here, has brought less culture shock but a little more anxiety with living by myself in a different language than my own.

little kitchen the double doors leading out to the balcony

picture taken off my balcony looking out to Corso Umberto, a well-known street downtown

taken from the second floor where the bedroom is

my huge bed with my new lamp, mirror and bedspread

cute little bathroom

Since Monday, Italia has experienced a string of earthquakes, having the big one happen early Monday morning in a town called L'Aquila, just north of Rome. At around 3:30 in the morning, both Antonello and I felt the earthquake in grandma's apartment and were scared as the whole place shook and lasted for about 15 seconds, which seemed like a very long time. No one and nothing was hurt but almost 300 people have died from the quake and thousands are left without homes. It has been devastating to watch the news; there was a story where a man had lost his mother and son, who were found dead, hugging, trying to comfort eachother as the roof collapsed on them.

On a lighter note, on Tuesday, Antonello and I got on the train and headed to Pompei to meet Bruno and to talk about my possible work with him. The meeting went well, seeing that Antonello and I actually went on a tour with Bruno as our guide, so I was able to experience what I would be doing. I tried to understand what he was saying but, mamma mia, I think I only understood like 30%....which is not enough. He gave me some study materials so I have been doing that but I feel I have such a LONG way to go in my italian. Bruno also mentioned that there may be some good work for me to lead tours to the island of Capri and to lead tours around Napoli, around the region of Campania so it might be another possibility but nothing is for sure yet.

For Easter, we are heading to Bari, which is on the east coast of Italy, and spending the weekend with his uncle and aunt. I think I should start preparing my stomach for the grand feast. :)

Ciao amici! A presto!

my trip in short...

2009-04-01T12:41:00.000-07:00

It began while I was checking my bags in at the British Airways counter. There was a young englishman behind me, traveling to London, his name was Nathan, but because of his accent, he pronounced it Nafan; so great. It was almost as if he was speaking pig talk. :) He was heading back after a month-long visit in the U.S. to see his 19 month old son and wife and we ended up sitting by eachother on the plane, well, an aisle separated us, and it was nice to have someone to talk with after such a teary good-bye with my mom.

On that particular flight, the plane wasn't full AT ALL so I had an aisle seat with two seats empty to the right of me so I could lay down, fully. As wonderful as that was, I couldn't fall asleep but the flight felt so short, that it was fine. I definitely felt like I wasn't prepared to fly for 8/9 hours, but somehow my body did it.

At the London airport, after standing in the security line forEVER, I started to talking to this young woman behind me, who I noticed had an Italian passport. We started speaking italian with eachother and since she was studying english, we had that language going too. It was so fun to be able to use what I've learned and also for her. Since her flight for the States didn't leave for another couple hours, she walked me to my gate and we just sat and talked before I left. Her name was Marta, she was 22, and was headed to Philly to stay there for 3 months to study English.

As I said good-bye to her and stood in the line to get on my final flight, I met two older women who were traveling to Rome for a 10 day-exursion. They were so pumped up, their enthusiasm was contagious. Rosemary and Martha were their names and they were so friendly as all 3 of us were able to sit next to each other for the last 2 and half hour leg of the journey.

When we landed in Rome, I got off the plane, headed through customs and picked up my bags with no trouble at all. I headed out to see Antonello and it was great to see his beautiful smile. After we left the airport, we headed to this little town called Fumicino which was right by the airport. It sat on this little river and although it was dark and rainy, we decided to go to a little pizzeria and walk in the rain, eating our little cheese pizzas. I really couldn't have asked for anything more special.

Today, I went and saw my apartment for the first time and met my landlords. I now hold in my hands, the 3 keys that will allow me to have a little more independence in my life. Part of me is super nervous to be on my own, but another part is looking forward to this next step. Who knows how it will turn out, I just know I would have kicked myself if I didn't try at all.

Jet-lag is setting in and I'm hitting a wall. I have to sleep now. :)

Ciao friends!

here we go again....

2009-03-30T13:54:00.000-07:00

I am off again to bell'Italia! My mom and I are heading out in a half an hour to get to the airport to see if my huge suitcases weigh-in under 51 lbs. and to collect our strength and courage as we once again say good-bye. These past 3 months at home have been so healing and I just pray that this next step, this next adventure will happen with grace, love and faith in every choice and with every morning.

Ciao with love!

one week left

2009-03-22T20:08:00.000-07:00

I grabbed a cup of coffee, a cozy ear warmer, ipod and gloves to sit on my favorite bench overlooking the Puget Sound tonight. This bench, dedicated to a Florence Sterling, says,

"WAVES ROLL IN, CLOUDS PART
SEA AND SKY EVER CHANGING
CALM MY RESTLESS SOUL"

I am leaving for Napoli in a week and will see Antonello after 3 months of a much needed rest at home. I will miss this bench and this beautiful neighborhood I grew up in, but am in need of this adventure and the inevitable 'change' that life holds. Perhaps it will help calm my restless soul.

MAMMA MIA!

2009-03-18T18:40:00.000-07:00

MAMMA MIA, what a week full of emotions! Up and down, down and up....

Well, my dear friends, things have once again changed and boy, am I humbled. I am humbled because that beautiful, little dream apartment has once again become a reality. My mom, Antonello, and his family, are all going to pitch in and make this happen and I am so humbled and thankful for all of them. I have felt for so long that I haven't had a family and now God has blessed me, not only with a strong, courageous, beautiful mom, but also with a gigantic Italian family that is generous beyond words. I guess this is what families do for each other and I am so blessed to have all of them in my story.

Here are some more pictures that Antonello took, this time with his real camera. You will see a new white couch, the entryway, my orange Rachael Ray bathroom :), and a view looking up to my place.

I leave in a week to head back to Napoli. EVERY night, I lay in my bed thinking about moving, again, to a new place and about my job opportunity to work as a guide in Pompeii and leaving my mom at the airport again and leaving dear friends again, and being surrounded by a language, again, that is so beautiful but so frustrating to learn......but with all of those "again's", I wouldn't trade it for anything. With this whole Italian adventure and living down in Santa Cruz for 6 years prior, I have learned so much about myself; some things I would just as soon keep locked up in my own little vault but in order to grow and change, they have to be released. For those of you who know me, know I am a very emotional person and that can be a healthy thing as well as a detriment; a stopper to growth.

About 4/5 years ago, I started reading this book that my roommate, Cara (hi Rooms!) had recommended, called 'Girl Meets God' and I wrote down something that rocked my world at that time and even more so now.

"He (God) is calling me to a place where He is truer than
everything else, truer even than how I feel."

As I head back to Napoli, and have started truly releasing/admitting/recognizing how powerful my emotions can be, I so desperately want God to be truer than them; to find a way to make this a reality for my life as I am faced with another life-changing move. I feel like it's more important now than ever.

foolish

2009-03-16T14:20:00.001-07:00

I feel so incredibly foolish for believing that the studio that Antonello found would work out. It has gone from 95% sure to 5% possible. He met with the landlord today to finalize rent/deposit and it just doesn't look like it's going to work out after all. I don't want to let money get in my way of this possibility but as I walked outside searching for it, I didn't see any growing on trees.

To go from such a high to such a low is beyond discouraging.

happy tears

2009-03-09T13:40:00.000-07:00

Isn't it funny/frustrating/amazing how things have a way of working themselves out? Funny & amazing because it seems impossible and unreachable at first...and frustrating because of all the emotion and worry you spend on thinking if it will work out or how it will work out. I have been thinking/stressing/praying for a place to live when I return to Napoli and it just so happened that today may have provided such a place...about 95% sure. :) Antonello and his mom went and looked at a beautiful (& NEW) apartment today in downtown Napoli, right on Corso Umberto, the street that led to my language school in the fall. The landlord was wonderful and the place was clean and beautiful and it's close to where Marina, Antonello's mom works, and it's SO close to Piazza Garibaldi where the train station is, and it's surrounded by clothes/shoe stores :), and I could go on and on and on!!!!!!!!!!

I feel as though my heart is exploding with joy whenever I think about it. I know when I go back, (in exactly 3 weeks) that I will probably face some culture shock again and that it will definitely take some time to adjust back into speaking italian but with this new place (if it ALL works out), I can have a little of my independence back. I will be able to experience more of 'me' in that beautiful country...I pray.

Here are a few pictures that Antonello took with his camera phone, so the quality isn't that great but you get the idea!

the little kitchen with a brand new little table (with it's cover still on!)

there is an upstairs/downstairs where the kitchen and bathroom are downstairs and the bedroom is at the top of the stairs.

of course every apartment has a little balcony! (taken from inside the apartment)

Stati Uniti for another month!!

2009-02-22T20:01:00.000-08:00

I am still trying to figure out my housing situation and also some job opportunities when I get back to Napoli so I figured I needed a little more time in the states to get that sorted out...as much as I can. So, I changed my ticket from the end of February to the end of March and am so ready to have another month to be with my mom, with friends and to stuff my nose in my italian books. I have a couple leads on some apartments/studios and can feel God just holding me and telling my heart to be patient and to, "Live for this day, Sarah."

So, I have been trying to do just that...which is a lot easier said than done. Personally, I LOVE to live in the future and often my best friend, 'WHAT IF' accompanies me on my journey and in my thoughts. Today I push that voice aside and rejoice in my beautiful story and rejoice in my beautiful fiance. I found a picture of him when he was younger, sitting on a beach in southern Italy; for him, I am grateful. Because of him, I am a better woman. With him, I grow.

Thank you Antonello.

where to build the nest?

2009-02-17T18:03:00.000-08:00

For the past few days, I have bundled up, grabbed my hat and my ipod, and have set out on daily walks, usually ending up looking out over Puget Sound on Magnolia Blvd. It has helped tremendously to center my thoughts and to pray about my 'unknown' future I am facing.

I have also been paying more attention to trees. I have been finding such beauty in them; in their tangled branches & in their strength. As I have been walking and looking at them, there have been many nests in those tangled branches as well. Each walk has brought another new nest and it got me thinking about these bird "houses". After my walk today, I came home and googled what it takes to make one...

Nests don't just show up overnight; birds have to first fly around, find and decide what tree they would like to settle into, then, they can start to build. Finding and collecting sticks, feathers, leaves, etc., to build their 'home', can finally begin after that crucial step in deciding where to live.

I feel like I am in the process of beginning to build my 'nest'. I have to first decide the 'where' part, which explains me flying around from Italy to the States and back again. When this can finally be decided, the building can begin. The sticks, feathers, and leaves can be collected and the building can start. I just want to choose the best and strongest tree for myself and the other little "bird" in my life. :)

amore

2009-02-15T14:06:00.000-08:00

I woke up to these beautiful flowers on my front porch from a dude named Antonello for Valentine's Day! :)

questions

2009-02-13T12:56:00.000-08:00

Here are some questions floating in my mind...

Where am I going to live when I move back to Italy?
With the opportunity of working as an 'english' interpreter in Pompeii, is this job going to be stable enough with providng the money I need every month?
If not, where else can I work?
When is the wedding going to actually be?
Am I going to be able to get back to the States before the wedding?
Is my mom going to be able to visit sometime before and during the wedding? Do we have enough money for that?
Where are we going to live afterwards?
Where is he going to work? Where am I?
Is all of this too big of a giant to face?

I can look back at my past and see miracles, and see how pain, discomfort and only knowing the "unknown", can all work for good...but, this, this seems far too scary and big to conquer. I wish one of the unknowns would come to light soon, to provide relief, to provide some kind of action. Action for my future that I could hold and work for. Right now, I feel as if I'm holding a bunch of air, a bunch of ideas, a bunch of hopes; nothing tangible. I wish I knew where to start.

I truly had a wonderful time being in Santa Cruz this past weekend, and seeing such beautiful, familiar faces. When I would share about my adventures in Italy, whether they were words full of joy or of difficulty, it was needed for my heart to hear the words out loud, even if I was the one who lived them. But now, I'm home again and decisions need to be made, questions need to be answered (according to me), and change is inevitable.

Whew...as my heart and mind think about all of these things daily, I am reminded that God is bigger and he can take all my little bullet-points and bring them to life. He's a good starting point.

il mio papa'

2009-02-03T21:15:00.000-08:00

~my Dad and I~

"The strongest and sweetest songs yet remain to be sung."

-Walt Whitman

a trip to Olympia...

2009-01-30T20:51:00.000-08:00

Today, my mom and I headed down to Olympia to visit my Aunt Jonnie, my cousin, Josh, and his little one, Sam....who absolutely melted my heart and my mom's as well. From the moment we walked through the door, little Sam had the biggest smile on his face while he bopped around on his cute little tush. We had the greatest time making faces at eachother and playing with his toys...my mom ticker was definitely ticking today! :)

I haven't seen my aunt since before I left for Italy, and haven't seen Josh for almost 7 years! It was so wonderful to spend time with the three of them, go out to lunch at good ol' Red Robin, laugh with Sam (oh be still my heart), and to simply be near to my family. I have missed them.

mom and Sam (he snuggled right in) sweet Sam

"Aunt" Sarah and Sam

beautiful Aunt Jonnie and "Aunt" Sarah :)

Dad Josh, Sam and I

finding peace

2009-01-22T17:08:00.000-08:00

Last week I came upon a beautiful day and decided to take a little walk. I left my house, walked up a few hills, down a couple streets and ended up at one of my favorite spots in Magnolia. It is a beautiful little park sitting right on top of the Puget Sound. I sat and watched a ferry make it's way down the Sound and listened to the wind in the trees. Peace was my middle name.

My mom gave me the sweetest book for Christmas, entitled, "be strong", by various authors/poets/artists. It is compiled of little sayings encouraging the world, each other and ourselves to 'be strong' and endure. I thought it would be fitting to share some of them through the beautiful pictures from my afternoon stroll.

"The best way out is always through." -Robert Frost

"You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it."

-Margaret Thatcher

"We are never powerless." -Jane Seymour

"Perhaps I am stronger than I think." -Thomas Merton

"Today I live in the quiet, joyous expectation of good." -Ernest Holmen

having purpose in life...

2009-01-12T19:57:00.000-08:00

Living in Italy for 6 months without a job and without all my "comforts" of home including being around my family and friends and being apart of a community that is familiar to me has left me feeling quite purposeless lately. My future is a bunch of little unknowns, that can be wonderfully exciting, but also very frustrating as well.

After having such a fabulous Christmas and feeling to thankful to have spent it with my mom and Antonello, I can now start to work on me and finding purpose in life again. My heart is crying for it.

I am finding purpose in a language. My mom got Rosetta Stone Italian for Christmas this year so I have been doing some studying here and there to not only lose the Italian I feel I have already lost but to also add some new info to my brain. If this story of mine is going to lead me back to Italy and possibly work as a tour guide in Pompeii, I better get workin'!

I am finding purpose in my mother. We have been having a wonderful, much needed time being with one another and taking long walks around the neighborhood while figuring out this life of mine. I am also 'trying' to find purpose in my past and in my family. It has been a long, hard road in trying to forgive the damage that has been done but now knowing that I am about to start my own family, it has lead me to look back and truly start to deal with the things that have been pushed down. I need to find purpose in the pain and in the woman I am and the woman God sees and has created...and that includes my past.

3 generations.

I am finding purpose in church. The "Mariners" group, aged 70+, at my mom's church, asked me to come in and speak at one of their meetings last week. They wanted to know all about Italy and Antonello, so I prepared some pictures, stories and my heart to spend a Friday night with them and eat yummy casseroles. At one point during the night, 'Dorothy' stopped me and said, "Sarah, honey, can you speak up, I can't hear you."...precious lamb of God. As I was leaving, I talked to Kay, who is 94 years old, and told her how difficult it has been lately. She answered by saying that sometimes it does your heart some good to talk out loud and share your story with others. Thank you Kay. So, this picture is of me after I came home from that night and my mom and I decided to take a picture of me in her new blouse...we love it!

I am finding purpose in re-connecting with friends and even being able to see some friends from high school this week! Kris and I went out for a birthday party and ordered some delicious food! It reminded me of Italy; I wonder why.

new year...new goals

2009-01-01T03:50:00.000-08:00

Hi guys.. this is Antonello
I can't remember the last time I posted something on "my" blog.. it has been a long time ago, maybe too long.
I just want to thank you all for your support and prayers about our relationship. It's an amazing and incredible relationship but she is so worth it, she is the most amazing, wonderful, beautiful and strong woman I have never met.. I ask for more prayers about our plans.. specially our wedding plans, so that God can inspire us about taking the right choices.
I thank you all again to be part of this story.
Happy new year!!!

CSI Seattle and a frozen "lake"

2008-12-29T14:19:00.000-08:00

Here are a couple video clips from the Arboretum, a park near the University of Washington. Yesterday, Antonello and I went for a walk there and played CSI and found a frozen lake. Something we didn't catch on camera was me going skiing down a snowy, muddy hill on my feet only to end up slipping and biting the dust and ending up on my back. It was really really funny...too bad we turned the video camera off right before the incident; maybe next year America's Funniest Home Videos. :o)

...a little empty

2008-12-29T12:00:00.000-08:00

Antonello left 6 hours ago and is up in the sky flying towards Italia...I will be heading there at the end of February. We have spent the last 6 months with almost 24 hours a day being with eachother and while it was intense as we faced many difficulties, our time together was also exciting and beautiful.

I feel a little empty but so full at the same time to know such a tender and compassionate soul.

"Snow"attle and Diaper Dude

2008-12-28T12:26:00.000-08:00

Well my friends, it has been quite an interesting and memorable Christmas here in Seattle. Aside from being able to spend my first Christmas with Antonello, we were hit with one of the worst snow storms in over 30 years. Welcome to "Snow"attle Antonello.

Apart from being homebound for almost 7 days, my mom, Antonello and I were not going to let the icy white stuff stop us, so we ventured out with the car a few of the days. We live on a very very very steep hill called Dravus so we had to find a different route to take, (our very first outing had us literally slipping down a semi-steep hill in the car...a little scary, I have to admit) but we were rock stars as we headed out in the snow.

This Christmas holiday started off a little rocky with the snow but ended up being absolutely wonderful filled with sledding, taking walks in the snow, solving puzzles, playing card games, eating chocolate and home-cooked Italian food, listening to Frank Sinatra's Christmas album, and making memories to last a lifetime! :o)

Eric and Susan, the couple that my mom works for, who are so kind and generous, blessed Antonello and I with a new flip video camera so here are a couple videos from that winter wonderland and Christmas morning. The first is of my backyard after one of the heaviest snow days (enough already!!!) and another is of our beloved Rufus. Eric and Susan are the proud parents of this wonderful corgi, Rufus, and while they have been away back east, we have gotten the privilege of watching over him. We like to call him 'diaper dude', seeing that he needs to wear a little dipey in his old age. We love him so. In this video, he wants my stocking on Christmas morning and won't stop until he gets a little taste! :)

snowy days, downtown Seattle, and memories!

2008-12-17T14:43:00.000-08:00

albero di nonna (grammy's christmas tree!)

2008-12-09T05:04:00.000-08:00

Here is grammy's little tree that we set up last night. As much as this family has become my family too, I am at a loss for words with how excited I am to see my mom. I don't think we have ever gone 6 months without seeing eachother..and if we have, we have never been this far apart. Bring on the home-made fudge!!!!!

heart of gratitude...

2008-12-02T02:53:00.000-08:00

I have 10 more days in Napoli before Antonello and I step on a plane and head back to the states for Christmas. As much as I am ready to see my mom and to be immersed back in english...I have to stop and truly think about all I have experienced here in the last 6 months. It has been so difficult but so healing as well. There are so many things that I will miss and there are so many things that I am grateful for....here are a few today!

So so so so thankful for grammy...the food she cooks tastes delicious every single time but more importantly, she is one of the most wisest, patient, and faithful women I have ever known.As much as I miss having a dryer, there is nothing like the smell of clean clothes hung out to dry on the line....

I probably have 11.5 more years to go before I am fluent in italian :), but I am more than grateful for being able to learn another language and to gain new perspectives with this culture and this country.

I am finally done with all the ornaments for the children at church!!!! I hope they like them!

...mmmm...fresh veggies daily and see that espresso maker in the back?....my favorite time of day is when grammy makes caffe! Buonissimo!

Don't get me started on the bread...so wonderful and fresh and...actually, I might be turning into a piece of bread with how much I eat daily! :)

The family always tells me that I am, "pazza per frutta!" They are right, I am crazy for fruit!

poesia....

2008-11-30T12:14:00.000-08:00

So Much Happiness

-Naomi Shihab Nye-

It is difficult to know what to do with so much happiness.

With sadness there is something to rub against,

a wound to tend with lotion and cloth.

When the world falls in around you, you have pieces to pick up,

something to hold in your hands, like ticket stubs or change.

But happiness floats.

It doesn't need you to hold it down.

It doesn't need anything.

Happiness lands on the roof of the next house, singing,

and disappears when it wants to.

You are happy either way.

Even the fact that you once lived in a peaceful tree house

and now live over a quarry of dust and noise

cannot make you unhappy.

Everything has a life of its own,

it too could wake up filled with possibilities

of coffee cake and ripe peaches,

and love even the floor which needs to be swept,

the soiled linens and scratched records...

Since there is no place large enough

to contain so much happiness,

you shrug, you raise your hands, and it flows out of you

into everything you touch. You are not responsible.

You take no credit, as the night sky takes no credit

for the moon, but continues to hold it, and share it,

and in that way, be known.

I bought a book of poems before I left for Italy, about 7 months ago in Santa Cruz, and I came across this poem which has touched my heart ever since. The highlighted words hold such truth for my life because I actually used to live in my own studio which was called the "Tree House" in California but now live over a street full of dust and noise each day....but even this CANNOT make me unhappy because it is about something deeper...something more meaningful than the way happiness floats. As much as I hate to see happiness disappear from my rooftop, I am left with something that stays. And as much as I forget this truth, when I remember, it is the sweetest taste.

keepin' busy

2008-11-25T10:36:00.000-08:00

Along with the wonderful gift of being able to spend time with 2 friends from the U.S. of A., the 3 of us were able to take a day trip to Sorrento. It was absolutely beautiful, but a little chilly as we walked through the little streets lined with stores full of ceramics, wood-work, Italia clothing, and ones that were full of limoncello! Clint and I walked down to the water's edge and ate pizza under the cold, bright sun while the rest of the day held wonderful conversation and in the end, a MAD dash to the train station to drop them off on time. Driving in Napoli through the little, chaotic streets is almost like you are in a video game...good times.

along the cliffs looking up at the little town

another beautiful view of the buildings

a cool tree we found along the walk...JT was my photographer

eating lunch and yes...I brought my billy-bob teeth to Italia
(I wouldn't ME without them)

Aside from spending some much-needed time with friends, Antonello and I are keeping busy. The children's ministry at his church has asked me to help out with posters, crafts, etc., so my current project are these little foam ornaments where you have to weave little pieces of ribbon through eachother to create this effect...my oh my, I keep reminding myself and my hands, that are becoming crippled, that it's for the kids. It's all for the kids. :)

This Saturday, Antonello is speaking to the high school ministry at his church so he has been busy with preparing his talk as well as workin' hard in school. Every time I look at what he is studying, I think it's another foreign language; it's incredible what this boy knows! Aside from church and school, he is planning on getting a tattoo with our initials. How does it look? :)

just what I needed...

2008-11-18T01:39:00.000-08:00

Two of my friends, Clint & JT, stopped by Napoli on their journey around Italy and we were able to hang out for the past couple days. It has been EXACTLY what my heart needed; to see familiar faces, to laugh and reminisce, to catch up on life, and to just have a piece of home with me. I only have a little over 20 days left before I leave to come home for Christmas, but this visit from the two of them has given my heart a little lift.

Antonello really enjoyed getting to know them and we were all so impressed and wowed by how far he has come with his English. Bravo amore mio! Now...if my Italian was as good... :) AND, as we were walking around the "old" part of Napoli, since JT is so artsy, he took some pictures of Antonello and I, which was so fun! Enjoy!

addicted....

2008-11-12T14:00:00.001-08:00

I LOVE FACEBOOK!

Bowling!

2008-11-10T01:32:00.000-08:00

I went bowling! I haven't been bowling in FOREVER and it's sort of awkward when you throw the ball for the first time but eventually you get the hang of it. Fun time with friends and each other....when Sarah is not being overly competitive! :)

tagged!

2008-11-05T06:41:00.000-08:00

I got tagged by two of my friends recently, Heather Bragg and Emily McCutchen, and if it's okay with them, I am going to change the rules and combine the two. One of them is to post 6 random things about yourself and the other is to post 8 different things with different categories.

So, I am going to post 8 random things about myself, 8 things I have bought since I have been in Italy and 8 things I'm looking forward to.

8 randoms:

I couldn't ride a bike or run very well until I was like 10 years old
my first tape I bought was the soundtrack from 'Cocktail' with Tom Cruise
my favorite movie is 'The Neverending Story'
I wanted my name to be 'Misty' instead of Sarah when I was younger
I went to 4 different elementary schools
I love the smell of gas
when I was little, I made mayonnaise and ketchup sandwiches for myself
I used to break-dance when I was younger and my nickname was BabySmooth

8 purchased goodies:

a cool new pair of boots
2 colorful sweaters
a black winter coat
calling cards
french manicure kit
lots of packs of gummy bears
a ticket home
presents for mom and friends

8 looking forward to's:

seeing my mom and friends when I come home
traveling with Antonello on the long flight to the U.S.
breathing Seattle air
being able to drive again (I hope I didn't forget!)
visiting Kristin's new house, my best friend from home
using grammy's recipe's to cook for my mom...and myself :)
my mom's fudge
going to the movies!

...so blessed

2008-11-01T14:05:00.000-07:00

Guess what?

I had the best two days in a row! Yesterday, I made my mom's homemade mac n' cheese for the whole family and they loved it and today I spent the whole day with the high school ministry from Antonello's church and I actually felt like ME! I spoke Italian (well, broken Italian) almost the whole day and 'comfortable' was my middle name. :)

We never know what a day will bring but we always have a choice and a new beginning within every single one.

Thank you to all of you who are praying for me and thinking of me during this, oftentimes difficult but always beautiful, time in my life.

ME being redefined

2008-10-29T10:42:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been in a situation where you feel like you are looking at life from the outside? I feel as though I am watching people talk and walk and live their lives here in Naples but am not fully connected. I feel like a "foreigner" in the truest sense of the word. There have definitely been times of feeling like the missing puzzle piece in Antonello's life, but never in this city.

I know that some of you who read my blog have commented on the fact that, lately, it has been full of "tension" or that it has had an underlying layer of loneliness with a desire to get back "home". I would be lying if I said that this journey I have been on for four months has come with a joyful heart. It comes with more of a uncomfortable one.

I know that I need to cherish being in the present and to enjoy every day I have here in Italy but there is this tug in my soul to be done with this chapter in my life. I am so extremely thankful for the beautiful, patient man in my life but how do I survive if I feel like I am an outsider? How do I survive when I don't feel comfortable being "ME" here?

ME is in the states, ME is in my own place, ME has time with my mom and with friends, ME is not being watched every time I clean or wash the dishes, ME is not feeling anxious when I have to speak, ME is not having to look perfect and put-together the way Italians do daily, ME is being able to go for a walk and get out of the house without having to take a horrible, packed bus to various places, ME is being lazy sometimes without feeling guilty for it, ME is independent and I can't be ME here.

With that, I know God comes first; I know God is my center; I know God is using this difficult time for good in my future; I know God is here and I truly am trying to focus on those truths but He just seems so invisible right now.

I don't know...maybe ME is being redefined.

a thankful countdown

2008-10-23T05:52:00.000-07:00

I have 50 more days here in Napoli before I step on an airplane on the 12th of December and fly to the one place I desperately want to see: Seattle, WA where my beautiful mom is. No matter what the weather brings, I just want to hug my mom, be in my house, drink a big cup of American coffee and breathe the fresh air in Seattle while taking a walk in my neighborhood.

I am so thankful for my city, my culture and the way I was raised. I am thankful for my amazing mom and that I will see her soon. She has been nothing but 100% supportive of the woman I am and the choices that I have made and are making. I pray to be even 1/2 the mother she is one day. She inspires me daily.

*a note for my beautiful whoosy-whatsit gotsum wi-ery: I love you so much and I want you to know how important and special you are to my life. Thank you for all your support you have given me on this journey that I have been on and for all your wisdom and advice.

One more thing, is it illegal for me to start listening to Christmas songs after Halloween? :)

He's going to kill me...

2008-10-20T10:55:00.000-07:00

...but I couldn't pass the chance to post these videos of Antonello singing old church songs last night at his sister's birthday party. It was supposed to be a surprise party but everything went wrong in the beginning from his parent's being stuck in traffic for over an hour to people showing up an hour early saying "surprise!"...but despite the bad start, we ended up having a fabulous time eating, talking, laughing, dancing and singing! Here a few pics from the party and a couple videos of "the singers"! I'm totally going to die when Antonello gets home from tutoring so I better hurry and post them! Ciao with lots of love!

It's the season...

2008-10-18T13:38:00.000-07:00

...for SOCCER!!!!

Antonello, Franco (dad), Fabio (best friend), Memo (friend from church), and I all watched another soccer game tonight. There is at least one a week, sometimes more and since I have never followed soccer in my whole life, it has been quite fun, I must admit.

Well, it's definitely fun to watch games with Antonello; I think he may be the loudest and the most passionate fan I have ever seen. (besides my mom with all her sports teams!) Every kick, every foul, every goal; he is right there in the action and best of all, I can watch the game through his face because it tells me exactly what is going on. It's really funny.

I am happy to tell you that NAPOLI won tonight!!!!! It was 2-1, against a team called Juventus from Northern Italy in Turin. Below, you will see a picture of two of my favorite players, Lavezzi and Hamsik and they happened to score BOTH of the goals tonight!! Bravo boys!

some life stuff

2008-10-14T13:05:00.000-07:00

I DID IT!!! Woo-hoo! Four weeks of language school has brought new friends and a deeper confidence in speaking Italian. Here are some photos of my class the last two weeks; we laughed together, we ate together, we made plenty of mistakes with our Italian and always had patience with one another. On my last day of school, there was a little party after class and the whole school came together and had WINE to celebrate another month! It was so much fun hearing everyone speaking Italian, as well as we all could, and being brought together because of this beautiful language.

one of my teachers, Emma, on the right

Now that school is over, I will probably be attending Centro Italiano for a couple more weeks in November, but until then, I have been asked to help out with the children's ministry at Antonello's church. Last weekend, I observed all of their classes and was asked to impart any advice, new ideas, etc., to their program. Right now, I am helping with making some posters for their curriculum and hopefully will be able to create a music DVD for the kids to worship with.

With Antonello in school every day, I have A LOT of time by myself...and grammy. :) So, until school starts again, I will be busy with studying on my own and something that I have found very helpful in speaking this language is reading. SO, I asked Emanuela, Antonello's sister, if she had any childhood books for me and she gave me some old pop-up books, Cenerentola (Cinderella, which originated in Napoli) and Biancaneve (Bianca=white & neve=snow). It helps to be familiar with the story but there are words and VERBS that I still need help with!

Today, I went to school and delivered some little gifts to my teachers and the front desk. They are absolutely wonderful people and their kindness and generosity inspires. After traveling to downtown Napoli, I have been in need of a coat, so I bought one today. There is something so powerful and amazing and strengthening to be in a completely different part of the world and be able to speak another language and have others understand what you're saying.

It was a good day.

..."stress and change and sacrifice."

2008-10-06T02:57:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pictures from this weekend and apart from turning into a pro soccer player (do you like my cool uniform?), we have had the most beautiful sunsets lately. And, aside from both of those things, I am in my last week at school. To be honest, I am extrememly happy and sad at the same time. I feel like I have hit a wall with my italian so thinking of finishing in 4 more days brings me joy but I also don't want to give up.

As much as this experience has brought laughter and "memories to last a lifetime", I still miss America and I so desperately want to "go home" soon. Talking to Doug Valenzuela, the missionary who is Antonello's pastor from Twin Lakes Church, yesterday at church, he said, "At least when I moved to Italy I had my wife, Diana, who spoke english and we shared the same culture. Where you are living and what you are doing takes a special person to do that. I would have given up already if I was you."

As encouraging as those words were to me, I feel like I am not that special person. I don't know if the deep love that Antonello and I have for each other is going to withstand this stress and change and sacrifice. Maybe I am not the right woman for this story.

I would give anything to see the ocean right now...

a short video taken from grammy's balcony

2 down, 2 to go

2008-09-26T09:45:00.001-07:00

My first two weeks of school have passed so I thought I should post a picture of my good-lookin' class for all to see.

From left to right you have:

1) Luciano-he's from Madagascar and speaks French so he has that throat thing going on when he speaks Italian. He is very sweet and has a beautiful smile that he readily shares with the rest of us.
2) Teresa-she's from Mexico and is at Centro Italiano with a group from her university. She's had an easier time picking up the language seeing how close Spanish is to Italian and was the only other girl in the class so we bonded right away.
3) me :)
4) Marcella-she was one of my teachers (Maria was the other one and I didn't get her picture last Friday but will post a pic soon!) Marcella was absolutely wonderful and so PATIENT with our broken Italian; it was her last day this past Friday because she usually only works during the summer months so I will have a new teacher tomorrow along with Maria.
5) Ezron-sweet Ezron is from India and has the most beautiful singing voice. He became my buddy and him and Antonello got along right away. He spoke some English so we were able to communicate a little easier with that. He is going to Rome soon to study theology and hopefully become a priest in 3 years! Mamma mia!!!
6)Giascinto-he is also from Madagascar and is friends with Luciano. He carries around one of those electronic dictionaries so we always knew we could count of him to be a fast translator!
7)Taka-he's from Japan and we had a blast together! He is in Naples for a year and is studying to be a pizza maker!!! He's one of the funniest people I know and along with Ezron and Teresa, his time at Centro Italiano is finished.

All 3 of them have already finished their course and won't be there tomorrow so I will have new students in my class...it truly makes me sad when I think of it. We sort of became a little family these past 2 weeks but you know what new people means........new memories, so bring it on!

Below is a picture of Piazza di Gesu which is located right by my school. There is also a cute library to the right of this statue where they sell a wide array of english books! Hooray!!!!

As my time at Centro Italiano is coming to an end in 2 weeks, I remember the fear and trepidation I felt when I had a month, 3 weeks, 2 weeks, 1 week, 1 day left until school started, and to read about it in my journal now, I have a deeper trust in God. He is so faithful and although I might have said that before, I not only say it now, but know it. I have experienced his faithfulness in a way I have never before.
As the cover of my journal says:

"She's turning her life into something sacred: Each breath, a new birth. Each moment, a new chance. She bows her head, gathers her dreams from a pure, deep stream and stretches her arms towards the sky."

question

2008-09-26T09:45:00.000-07:00

Do you ever just want to push the fast forward button on life to pass a difficult time so you can see what is on the other side...to see if all of it is worth it?

once upon a yesterday...

2008-09-21T08:07:00.003-07:00

Once upon a time...

...I met an Italian man who, after 6 days of knowing me, approached me and shared his heart with me. He told me he thought I was special and beautiful and that he wanted to know me better.

Once upon a yesterday...

...this Italian man and I traveled back to the exact spot where he said those sweet words over 1 year ago.

my first day of school!

2008-09-15T10:11:00.000-07:00

Well, my friends...I went to my first day of school today at Centro Italiano. Above, you will see a picture of what it looks like outside. Thankfully, Antonello had a test at his school so both of us were able to take the bus together this morning and my precious fiance walked me to the front door of Centro Italiano, which resembles what hobbits would walk through!

I was a little early, so as we arrived, a woman did as well. It turns out she is one of the teachers and her name is Monica. Antonello asked if he could drop me off with her and she said of course; I was in good hands. Monica and I went through the hobbit door and entered the courtyard, which is shown above. We climbed 3 flights of stairs and found our floor; she unlocked the door and I walked into what my life will look like for the next 4 weeks.

After meeting a girl from Austria, named Ursula, who speaks English, and taking both a written and oral placement test, I was placed in what seems to be level 3. There are 5 other people in my class and we are only allowed to speak Italian in class...wait a minute...is this my life?

Am I really doing all of this? Did I really move over here to be with Antonello in a whole new world and am now studying in Italia? Am I really going to wake up tomorrow morning and leave the house BY MYSELF and take two buses, for a total of 45 minutes, to travel to school and speak Italian for 4 straight hours without any english help and then hop back on the bus, straining my brain even more to push the little red button on the bus for my correct stops to make it home okay?

All I can say is, "Sono pronta per questo avventura!"

a trip to Bari

2008-09-13T10:41:00.000-07:00

I went to my first Italian wedding...well, my first Italian Catholic wedding that is. Antonello's cousin, Dario, got married so I met even more family as we traveled 2 hours to the east side of Italy, called Bari. Marina's brother, Mino, lives over there with his wife, Maria, and their three children. It is definitely smaller than Naples and is located more in the country; it was nice to see another city other than Naples, but we were happy to get back home on Friday.

We had a lot of fun eating the 13 course meal (which wasn't that great) and dancing the night away. The whole night lasted almost 12 hours so needless to say, we were very tired.

The next morning, Antonello's aunt, Maria, took us to the "The Grottoes of Castellana" which was discovered in 1938. It was absolutely breathtaking and unfortunately you weren't allowed to take any pictures except in the first cave, which you will see below.

Franco, Emanuela and I before the wedding

My handsome fiance

Emanuela, Franco, Marina, me, Antonello & Nonna (Grammy)

outside the restaurant where we had appetizers

Dario and Katia...the newlyweds another view from outside the restaurant...the party moved out here for dancing and the cutting of the cake

the tables inside the dining room Marina and I
Mom and son
the best food of the night; lemon sorbet in raspberry sauce"I wanna dance with somebody!" outside pics

outside of the grottoes...houses called "trulli"inside the grottoes

2 stories

2008-09-10T10:54:00.000-07:00

Story #1:

On Monday, Antonello and I went to downtown Naples and shopped around their street fair they have daily. We ended up around the movie section, looking at a huge pile of them. At this fair, because Naples sun is so hot that it can burn your skin off, they have huge umbrellas set up all along both sides of the street to provide some much needed shade. As I was walking around the huge bin that contained the movies, my feet found the gigantic umbrella pole and and since it was a little lopsided, it felt like a trampoline. Well...of course, I started jumping on it and after a few seconds of fun, the umbrella started to fall over! With my huge muscles and of course some adrenaline, I braced myself and grabbed the pole with all my might to bring it upright again. All the commotion caused a few Italians to run over to my aid; I showed them my muscles and they laughed. After finding a movie, we decided it was time to go home so we headed to the bus stop...this is where Story #2 comes alive so keep reading.

Story #2:

After the street fair, Antonello and I (and our four bags full of goodies from a successful shop that afternoon) got on the bus to head home. The bus was absolutely packed and we barely found seats. The bus system here requires you to pay for a ticket ahead of time and when you first enter the bus, you are required to put your ticket into a machine which prints the time/date and spits it back out to you. As much as this is required, many Neapolitans end up taking a chance and riding the bus for free...as long as the "controllore" (or ticket checker guys) don't catch you and make you pay money (usually 40-80 euro) for cheating the system.

On this particular day, Antonello decided to take a chance and not stamp our tickets so we could use them for another day. Lucky day for us because through the sea of people came one of the ticket checker guys!!!!! (I forgot to mention that it is rare to see them on the bus.) Coming up to us and asking for our tickets, Antonello handed him our blank ones and this ticket checker guy was not happy with us. Thinking it couldn't get worse, it did. My wonderful fiance started speaking english and saying to the guy, "I don't understand you. What is happening?" I couldn't believe my ears...he was totally pretending to be American not understanding what was going on so maybe we wouldn't have to pay. Antonello kept looking at me and saying, "What is happening Sarah?" I started kicking him and telling him to speak Italian but he kept a straight face the whole time and wouldn't stop. Well, this ticket checker guy thought that BOTH of us were Italian and were lying to him.

By this time, EVERYONE in the back of the bus was listening to what was happening with us and was telling the ticket checker guy that I was American but he didn't believe anyone, including me. He was pretty mad at this point and said to both Antonello and I, "Andiamo polizia!" That means, "Let's go to the police." He made us get off the bus with him and at this point, my heart was in my throat and I thought I was being taken to jail. I started saying, "Mi dispiace, mi dispiace!", which means, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He proceeded to write something on both of our previously blank tickets and walked away. After turning to Antonello with a surprised look on my face, he explained to me that we had been given "warnings" and if we did it again, we would have to pay 80 euro for our shenanigans.

We escaped, but just barely. Criminals on the run.

culture shock

2008-09-05T00:03:00.000-07:00

Definition of culture shock....

The mental shock of adjusting to a new country and a new culture, which may be dramatically different from your own.
Being in a strange place and losing the power to communicate can disrupt a person’s world view, self-identity, and systems of thinking, acting and feeling.

I think it would be fair to say that these 2 definitions sum up EXACTLY what I am experiencing.

mental shock...check
dramatically different culture...check
strange, unfamiliar place...check
unable to communicate (fully & effectively)...check
questioning my self-identity...check

Sometimes, on grammy's balcony, amidst the noises on the streets of Napoli, I close my eyes and picture what my life used to look like. I know I have only been here for a little over 2 months, but it is comforting to sense the familiar, to remember faces, to cherish times of solitude I once had, and to breathe in my previous independence that now seems so fleeting.

His plan is bigger and better than my plan...check

we're back dudes!

2008-08-29T08:26:00.000-07:00

I never thought being connected to the internet could make me, could make us, so happy. We checked about 2 hours ago on this hot, Friday afternoon and we are officially connected again; we are back in the game coach!

Here are some pictures from our time on Ischia, a little island off the coast of Napoli. We (meaning his family and I) had to take a huge ferry over and despite the 100 degree weather and almost throwing up (both Antonello and I...oh, and his sister) from a long and windy bus ride over to the other side of the island called Sant'Angelo, we settled down and had some lunch. Sant'Angelo is an old fishing town that allows no cars on it's little streets. After taking the bus as far as it could go, we had to walk the rest of the way down into the village where many colored houses lined the hills. Even though Capri is more famous and well-known, people consider Ischia to be more beautiful. Both are amazing in my book.

a view of an old lighthouse from the ferry on the way to Ischia

more amazing views of the hillside on our journey to the island

Emanuela and I

*cheese* on the ferry

the hillside on the harbor at Ischia

our ferry, the "Medmar"
lovin' the taxis

the village in Sant'Angelo

more views...
a beautiful mosaic leading up to the hillside

This video is taken on the ferry back to Napoli and I love it because a guy was walking around with his accordion playing music for us ferry folk. Only in Italia.

17 days and counting until I start school. Excited, yes. Ready, AAAAAHHHHHH! I just found out I have a test on the first day of school and this has left me a little worried. My mom said I came out of the womb with a furrowed brow but I think it's time to unfurrow (word?) it.

Living here the past 2 months has taught me more about myself than a lot of other things I have gone through. Going through culture shock and being so far away from everything that has been safe and comfortable and familiar in my life, is turning out to be the most beautiful thing that could have happened. I am truly finding myself and more importantly, finding out who my beautiful Creator is.

There are days though, where I want to run back to the U.S. to find washers AND dryers instead of hanging ALL my clothes outside on a line; or going to my favorite coffee shop/bookstore instead of looking down the street to find run-down stores and garbage; or to turn on the t.v. and watch reruns of "Friends" instead of soccer, soap operas, & more soccer; or to have my studio and independence back instead of being around family every day.

....each day I am beginning to thank God for the simplicity of hanging my clothes and how peaceful it is to help grammy. I look at the streets and see people who are trying to survive and who need Jesus in a powerful way; an opportunity to share. I can't wait to go to a soccer game now and when I think about it, I don't really miss my shows. Independence will come but right now, I am surrounded by people who love me and care for me.

God is amazing. I am going to go watch the sunset and talk with my Dad...

...no internet

2008-08-26T10:41:00.000-07:00

Sad news...we lost internet connection at grammy's and can't add to our blog at Antonello's parents house. AAAAHHHH!!! I am updating our blog from Doug Valenzuela's house, a missionary from Twin Lakes Church. Antonello and I are having cheeseburgers and french fries for dinner tonight at their house and I am OH SO EXCITED!

Pray we get this figured out soon; I can't be away from contact with the U.S. (I might lose my mind) :)

Love to all of you.

photos galore!

2008-08-12T01:44:00.000-07:00

We got back to Napoli yesterday afternoon and definitely miss waking up to the beautiful sea. Some good news though: They are picking up the garbage here EVERY DAY and they are starting to RECYCLE!!!! Woo-hoo! Bravo Napoli!

Here are some pictures of the last couple weeks at the vacation house. It's now time for both Antonello and I to start getting ready for school. Both of us start in September and are looking forward to experience that part of life together. It is definitely scary for me to think about taking the bus by myself in the crazy city of Napoli and still not being able to completely speak sentences fluently, but I will try. Prayers are greatly appreciated! :)

the view of the piazza in a beautiful little town called Maratea

I found the coolest doors which led to people's homes...this one is in Maratea

the best dessert croissant filled with nutella called a "bomba"

a beautiful statue in Maratea outside an old Catholic church

Marina and Emanuela

a house which I fell in love with...the history of this place was beautiful

a narrow walkway leading to houses and stores

who is that hot man? Oh...my fiance :)

Here are more pictures from Diamante, a little town we went to which means "diamond". They are known for their peppers, as you can see on this woman's balcony.

Antonello's family from a balcony in Diamante

...another beautiful door

the streets were lined with beautiful narrow walkways

sunset in Diamante

view from the main street

*smile*

photos from the Arco Magno...our 3rd trip there

dad Franco, friend Raffaele, me, friend Rosaria, and cousin Nunzia

umbrella's galore!!!

view from the top of the mountain at the Arco Magno...our beach was in the little cove in the upper right-hand corner of the picture

on the last day at the beach, my flip-flops broke so I had to wear Franco's aqua shoes...

I know, my feet are lookin' hot!

....back to Napoli

2008-08-06T02:01:00.000-07:00

We can't believe that 40 days has already gone by at the vacation house...WOW! We head back to Napoli this weekend and get ready for school. Here are a couple pictures of our last date night
here in Praia a Mare. Arrivederci con abbracci e baci!

Adventures by the sea...

2008-07-28T08:32:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures from a magnificent sunset 2 nights ago, the most wonderful visit with my dear friend Liz from California and who was on a trip to Greece & Italy, a family night which included the fanciest watermelon I have ever seen, a special date night with my fiance, a beautiful hike to the Arco Magno, and a day trip to Diamante. We will post more pictures later from the day trip to Diamante...it was absolutely beautiful!

Video time!

2008-07-18T08:59:00.000-07:00

Here is a 360 degree view of the beach where we get super tan and have super a lot of fun. :) The guy talking to Antonello is his cousin named Nicola. He is a twin and I am trying to keep all of the 13 family members I have met so far in order. :) I have to go practice the family tree now! Ciao!

Love never fails...

2008-07-16T08:21:00.000-07:00

Things we've been up to...

2008-07-10T08:03:00.000-07:00

Eating lots of good food!
Mini-golf…and watching Sarah hit the ball out of the golf park and then tripping over hole #3
Getting REALLY tan (after burning for Sarah)
Eating tons of popsicles and slushies
Walking around main street and the waterfront
Getting bug bites all over our legs and arms
Taking long swims in the sea
Playing Yahtzee and an Italian card game named “Scopa”
Playing badminton on the beach and then watching Antonello trip over his paddle and break it in half…good times.
Eating "bombe con cioccolata" (pastry filled with chocolate)
Hiked up to the "Santuario Madonna della Grotta"
Going out to dinner for Franco & Marina's 27th wedding anniversary
Being precious lambs of God!

sunset from the balcony of the vacation house

anniversary dinner for Franco & Marina

getting ready to go outus again ...view of the entrance to the vacation house27 years after...the most beautiful everthe most bitten leg everbellissimi!!ancient castle on Praia a Mare coastthe "campanile" clock by the sanctuaryview from the sanctuary

no connection

2008-07-05T11:04:00.000-07:00

We haven't posted in awhile because we don't have an internet connection at the vacation house but we found a tiny spot today where it does work! So, we will post a new blog soon with pictures!! It is absolutely beautiful here and the weather has been wonderful. I am a little burned on my back and Antonello is getting darker and darker...go figure. He's Italian.

Love to all of you!

updates

2008-07-01T13:31:00.000-07:00

Update on the resident permit: After waiting for an hour and a half at the post office...(did I mention that the post office was like 150 degrees)...in downtown Naples, I finally turned all my paperwork in and my resident permit will be with me shortly. It took Antonello and I four and a half days to get all the necessary papers and information to get it done, but it's finally finished...we hope.

Update on the weather: I haven't lived in such humid weather before and it's quite difficult, especially in the afternoon when it is super hot and muggy outside. BUT, there are still beautiful times during the day, especially this one, where Antonello and I watched the sunset.

Update on the vacation house: We leave for the house on Thursday and while we are waiting to leave, Antonello and I have played numerous games of Yahtzee. If you look really hard, you will see 5 dice on the table, all with the number 1 on them. In one of our games, he rolled this hand on the first try...I'm going to take him to Vegas.

Update on Naples: Although things here are VERY different from the U.S., I am just thankful to be here with my love and feel so blessed to share my life with him.

memories

2008-06-30T05:53:00.001-07:00

I (Sarah) got stuck in a bank today.

Please remember...always make memories to last a lifetime.

Ciao!

together again...

2008-06-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

Hi, it's us...finally. The last four days have been full of excitement and lots of little ups and downs. Not only do we have to start packing for the vacation house, but also finish getting a residence permit and medical insurance. We already thought that I (Sarah) had finished the biggest job with getting the student visa to come over here for a year but now the process to get a permit is giving both of us a headache. We had to go to 3 different post offices yesterday but NO ONE had this special kit for obtaining a permit so his dad took us to downtown Naples and we finally got it...after getting a big blister on my toe from walking around all morning. (not to mention it was like 200 degrees outside) Right now, we filled out all the forms and are going to buy some insurance tomorrow and turn everything in before we take a train and leave for the vacation house on Wednesday. I have to do this all within 8 days of arriving in Italy...Mamma mia!

We had a wonderful church service today where I (Sarah) got to see a lot of people I knew and recognized from Festival last June. After church, we went back to grammy's for lunch with the whole family and took naps and tonight we are going to hang out with some friends!

Ci vediamo! (See you later!) :)

P.S. These beautiful roses were waiting for me when I arrived at grammy's...bellissimi! Grazie Antonello!

...the time has come...

2008-06-25T23:00:00.000-07:00

Just a quick post to let you know that......I'M IN ITALY! Gotta get some more z's....ciao!

...a note from Antonello

2008-06-23T11:23:00.000-07:00

3 months are passed!!! I can't believe it..she is almost here... one more day. I can't wait. I need to see her... The last 20 days have been very hard for my mind, I have studied like I have never done before. I took another test today, one of the hardest, but more the things are difficult, greater is the pleasure to overcome them; I need to thank God for supporting my brain, and giving me the ability to not go crazy!!! Anyway, I'm done for awhile, done with my tests and especially done with the garbage, I hope things will get better, Naples is a extraordinary city but needs to get "clean" in all the ways...soon I will see the most beautiful ever, Sarah.. Thank God for this opportunity, vacation house we are coming...

Busy...busy...busy

2008-06-22T23:25:00.000-07:00

Man, I have been busy. I thought, after leaving my 40 hr/week job, that it would leave me more time to just sit and breathe but it has been GO GO GO since I arrived in Seattle two weeks ago! I guess this is what happens when you are getting ready to move out of the country!!!! :)

Aside from getting some last minute goodies, my mom and I traveled to Olympia to see my aunt, who I haven't seen in years. It was so good to see her beautiful face.

AND...mom and I have been very busy not only with packing but with getting the house in order and that includes the front yard as well...it was a total jungle when you walked out our front door and it took me 2.5 hours to mow the lawn but I gotter' done! My mom, on the other hand, was the trimming queen...look at how savvy she is holding that weed wacker! Did I mention the safety goggles?

I wonder what it's like to be so cool... :)

Girls Night Out!

2008-06-14T12:23:00.000-07:00

Being away for 6 years has not diminished my love for downtown Seattle! My beautiful best friend from college for almost 10 years, Kristin, and her friend (my new friend), Jen and I all went downtown last night and had a blast laughing and talking about life. We ate delicious pizza and an "out of this world" artichoke & crab dip...I'm still excited about my upcoming Italian food though!!!

Right now, it's time for my mom and I to get on our walking shoes and travel around familiar streets and soak in my wonderful neighborhood where I grew up. I see the sun...I better go!!! Ciao!

Back to the rain!

2008-06-10T20:41:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I was in sunny Santa Cruz. As I write this, I am back in cloudy, drippy Seattle...but with much joy in my heart. It took 6 people at different times during the day to jam 15 boxes, 4 suitcases, 1 t.v. and many other knick-knacks into the back of a Ford Explorer..it was an amazing sight I tell you.

After meeting my beautiful friend, Yolanda, at Surf City at 6:30 a.m. for a large cup of coffee, my mom and I headed out to find I-5 which would lead us to Seattle. The trip was full of talking, singing, laughing so hard we both had tears running down our cheeks, 2 gas breaks, seeing the aftermath of a horribe accident in Oregon, driving through numerous slow-downs from road work, getting lost on a 405/I-5 interchange, and trying to just survive the last 3 hours in the pouring down rain to get home at 1:30 in the morning. I can't tell you how happy we both were to get out of the car and into our beds. I think I fell asleep before my head hit the pillow.

2 weeks until Italia! I have to go through all my stuff now...CIAO!

3rd time is the charm!

2008-06-05T21:46:00.000-07:00

I woke up at 7:45 a.m. this morning, drove to my dear friend Susan Hurley's and borrowed a more dependable car for my THIRD trip to the Italian embassy in San Francisco. I found a friendly-staffed garage to park in and walked boldly to the front door of the Italian embassy, with a stuffed folder in hand.

After waiting an hour and a half and having pleasant conversations with two women from India, who were trying to obtain visas as well, my eyes saw an answered prayer- the man who helped me during my second round of my visa process. During that visit, he shared vital information with me and truly helped me see the possibility in traveling to Italy as a student to be able to stay with Antonello for a year.

He was on his smoke break and my heart was lifted in hope as I saw him, knowing that the Lord was there with me. As I was first in line, he came up to me, smiled with his eyes, and asked me if I was ready. I walked to the window, stood before him, handed him my paperwork and waited in anticipation. He went through all of my 11 documents that are needed for obtaining a student visa, and asked me if I wanted some good news. I said yes and he gave me the nod which meant the process was complete. After a "grazie mille" (thank you very much), and a "prego" (you're welcome) with a wink from my Italian embassy angel, I danced out the door. Literally.

On June 19th, I will have my student visa. Watch out Napoli, here I come!

It's coming to an end...

2008-05-15T17:19:00.000-07:00

thoughts from Sarah...

I'm sitting at my desk on a beautiful, sunny Thursday evening, knowing I have 3 more weeks left in California before I head up to Seattle for another 2, and then off to Italy for I don't know how long...my life is surreal and there are days I truly believe it should belong to someone else. As of right now, I am in the process of obtaining a student visa where I can stay for a year in Italy and enroll in language classes. Knowing the Italian embassy can be a little difficult to work with, God has truly provided the right people, the right information, AND the right parking spots as I have traveled around San Francisco! So now, I am getting all of my 10 documents that I need for that visa and praying I receive it before I leave in June...this is quite a ride to say the least.

There are many times in our life where we will have to say goodbye and although I am not looking forward to saying goodbye to Twin Lakes Church or California/Seattle or all of my dear friends or most of all, my beautiful mom...I truly know this is my next step in life and I will embrace the unknown. I will embrace the questions that will get answered in their proper time. I will embrace living life and I will embrace following God. I want no other choice. (...and my mom said she would disown me if I didn't go!)

I am so stinkin' excited to see my beautiful fiance face to face again and just be able to sit in the same room as him, which means we would be in the same time zone! He will pick me up from the little Capodichino airport on June 25th at 11 am and I will cry and laugh and snort and be the happiest maialino (little pig) ever. Grazie Dio per Antonello e per tuo amore.

The sun is getting ready to set and I am getting ready to head home on this Thursday evening. I am grateful for this journey...this scary, amazing, overwhelming, joyous, nerve-racking, incredible, growth-filled, what the heck am I doing journey. Aren't we all on one?

Antonello's side of the story....

2008-04-26T11:35:00.000-07:00

Questa è la mia storia..
I piani del Signore sono infiniti e per quanto noi possiamo sforzarci di comprenderli non ci riusciremo mai… Non stavo cercando l’amore ma è arrivato, e nel modo più imprevedibile. Io non dovevo essere a casa quella domenica di giugno, a dire il vero io non volevo neanche esserci, perché non volevo fare da traduttore e speravo vivamente che qualcun altro potesse farlo al posto mio ma evidentemente questi non erano i piani del Signore… Così trascorsi il pranzo insieme a 3 americani. Non so quello che stava succedendo dentro di me, ma sentivo la necessità di rivedere queste persone, specialmente quella donna che con le sue risate, con i suoi occhi, con la sua gentilezza mi aveva interessato tanto da provare dentro di me un emozione particolare… Sarah. Così durante la settimana seguente avemmo modo di parlare e giorno dopo giorno cresceva dentro di me il sentimento che lei poteva essere la donna che desideravo per la mia vita. Sapevo che non sarebbe stato facile, lei viveva a migliaia di chilometri di distanza e proveniva da una cultura completamente diversa dalla mia, sapevo che questo avrebbe potuto cambiare la mia vita, inoltre non potevo permettermi di giocare con i sentimenti di una persona così speciale… ma sentivo pace nel mio cuore, una pace che proveniva dall’alto.

Nonostante il mio inglese non fosse ottimo, non sono fluente neanche adesso a proposito, quando lei ritornò negli Stati Uniti, incominciammo questa relazione a distanza con email e telefonate, naturalmente non è stato facile e non lo è ancora adesso, ma quel tempo è stato utile per conoscerci meglio e per realizzare che forse quella storia che sembrava uscita da un libro di fiabe potesse essere vera. Così finalmente in dicembre avemmo l’opportunità di vederci per due settimane…semplicemente meraviglioso. La donna che io avevo desiderato era lì vicino a me, una donna che merita il meglio possibile da questa vita, perché? Perché è lei. Furono due settimane che ci aiutarono a crescere insieme ed a prendere delle decisioni… io ne presi una che non avrei mai immaginato 6 mesi prima… prendere un aereo (per la prima volta) e volare negli Stati Uniti (da solo) a marzo. In realtà da dicembre a marzo presi anche un’altra decisione quella di prendere un impegno serio con lei, quello di volerla sposare.

The Story

2008-04-21T20:41:00.000-07:00

This is a story I still read about in my journal or remember from the memories I experienced from the summer of 2007 and find it hard to believe. It is the story of how Antonello and I met.

June 17th, 2007

"It was a great day-understatement of the day...or of the year. I had one of my most rewarding experiences today; Italian church service in the morning under a scorching sun, then a wonderful pranzo (lunch) with my host family, the Scognamiglio's-Franco, Marina, Antonello and Emanuela-I love them and will truly miss them. After lunch we had the sweetest fruit I've ever tasted, a wide array of beautiful desserts and some caffe. A family I never knew even one day ago, a grande delicioso meal and kisses accompianed with a ciao delivered memories that will leave a permanent place in my story."

We met on that hot day as I sat melting at his lunch table while given the new nickname, "pazza", which means crazy in Italian. How fitting. After Sunday lunch, Antonello and I would see each other periodically through the day as I helped run, along with groups from around the U.S. and Italy, a community-based, God-centered festival for the families of Napoli. Falling in love with the chaos, colors and beauty of Italy I sadly flew back home at the end of June.

Our friendship grew over email and long hours over the phone and before I knew it, it was December and I was back on an airplane headed to Napoli to see how these two very different lives would work. I guess it helped that we had the time of our lives and before Antonello knew it, he was on a plane headed to California 2 months later. Through trials, laughter, grace, tears, language barriers, love, and our faith, Antonello proposed on a windy yet beautiful Friday evening on the shore of Twin Lakes Beach.

So now, I have 64 days left in the U.S. before I leave to travel 17+ hours to spend the summer with my fiance in Italy; hoping and praying for an opportunity to arise that allows me to stay longer. Another country, another language, another culture, another family, another community, better food :), and a place in my life where I've never been before. To say this has been the most stressful and complicated time in my life holds some truth...

...but it doesn't comapre to how BIG God is and how He has blessed me with such a tender, compassionate, forgiving, and gracious man which helps to chip away at the doubts, the questions, and the unknowns of our future together. People keep asking both of us where we will live after we get married and where we will work and where we will raise kids and so on and so on. All I know is that I will leave America in 64 days to see my man and finally my time with dating a webcam will be over!

That is all I know and that is all I need to know.

...io ho pace nel mio cuore...

Really?

2008-04-12T23:13:00.000-07:00

We are engaged!!!!

Noi siamo fidanzati!